To every mom who wants to punch me in the face:

Hi friends.

I had one of those nights. Those nights don’t happen all that often anymore.

My youngest [age 4] had a diarrhea night. You know… accidents in bed, constantly up and to the potty. And as a result I found myself stumbling around the house in a haze for much of the midnight hours.

And now I find myself stumbling around the house still in that haze…. the haze of exhaustion. I collapse in the arm-chair with my coffee and exclaim to Chris, “I haven’t felt like this since I had a newborn!” As we proceed through math and onto English, all I could think about was nap time. And surely that run I had planned was not going to happen.

I am frequently asked, “How do you have the time, the energy, to train for triathlon or climb mountains in the midst of being a mom?!” And behind this sometime sincere question I can see your real thoughts. I’ve made you feel like you aren’t doing enough.

You want to punch me in the face. I get that. And that is ok.

Why? Cause I’ve been there too. I’ve silently cursed the mom in her yoga clothes, all refreshed from her workout, while I juggled two dark circles under my eyes and barely had the energy to make my family dinner.

You mothers with newborns, you moms barely sleeping at night, don’t worry. You will be normal again.

You will have energy again.

You will see life through new eyes and color will return to your vision. I am amazed what a little sleep, or lack of, can do to our lives.

Hiking White Pine in the Wasatch

I wasn’t running every day when I was sleeping only 4 hours a night. I was napping during every free moment. I wasn’t training for triathlons while nursing each of my young ones. I could barely stuff my upper parts into a sports bra.

Your kids don’t need a super mom. They need you, and just who you are.

It is ok to not be able to do it all.

My goal: To remind you to dream again when the haze clears.

To remember you can fly down trails, find high summits, climb new lines and push past boundaries with your bodies. Maybe you don’t want to. That is fine. I don’t do all this “stuff” because I have to but because I come alive in the midst of it.

Find what makes you come alive, live it with passion. Find your higher summit.

Change your normal

21 comments on “To every mom who wants to punch me in the face:
  1. This encouraged me today Alyssa! Despite so many best efforts, I am on the eve of a first birthday having only slept through the night a handful of times. We still don’t feel like “ourselves”, and it is discouraging to still feel underwater some/a lot of the time. Thanks for giving me perspective that a) sleep makes a difference! and b) it does get better. Your honesty is a blessing to me. 🙂

  2. Thank you. As a previously active person now in the midst of motherhood with an 8 week old baby, I wonder if I will ever get my body and active lifestyle back. Perfect timing 🙂

    • All in good time. (Not something we like to hear, and often not something we believe. But true nonetheless.) And while my body will never LOOK the same as it did before, it is performing better and stronger than ever.

  3. I’m pregnant with my first and am trying to figure out how I’m going to balance everything. I’m already putting pressure on myself to keep up a standard that I have made up in my head. I love it when you say your kids just need you and who you are. What a relief! That’s going to be one of my mantras. Motherhood is going to be messy. I’m not perfect, and I want my kids to see that so they can see how much Mom needs Jesus too.

    • I so agree! We always tell ourselves, “We will never be perfect but we can always be repentant.” I hope my kids catch that. Moms these day seems to have a high standard of perfection to maintain. But none of us really are. And none of us ever can.

  4. I gave up my 20’s to raise my kids. Most of my 30’s as well, but began riding bikes with them, skiing with them, hiking with them. Then in my 40’s when they were grown, I started my own adventures; triathlons, hiking, biking and travelling. Now that I am midway through my 50’s and in great health, I look forward to sharing my love of adventure with my grandchildren. Great article!

  5. Pingback: Pursuing Strength to Enhance an Active Outdoor Lifestyle | Tales of a Mountain Mama

  6. This honestly made my day. The other night I was sitting on the couch in tears because my 18 month wont go to bed. Being a single mom I try so hard to do what I used to but I broke down and had a great pillow to lean on. Knowing that the sleepless nights and awful terrible 2’s will come to an end, and I will be able to go back to climbing like I used to brings a smile to my face. Thank you.

  7. I’m really glad I stumbled upon this post today. I have a three year old and I’m pregnant with my second, and I certainly have days I feel like those favorite parts of me – the adventurous, athletic, energetic person I was so effortlessly before having kids – is long gone. Thanks for the reminder that she isn’t gone for good, and that it’s okay to hang on to those dreams when the going gets tough!

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