Fighting for your wife [from the man cave]

This is part 3 in our series all about marriage. If you are wondering what you’ve missed,  well… here ya go: Stirring Passion in Marriage and Life, Love, and a Good Burger. Our friends over at Bring The Kids are teaming up with us, check out today’s post on finances.

It is 2:30 in the morning. A rapist is in your house and standing above your wife. What do you do?

I like to imagine me tackling them to the ground, ripping out their eyes and throwing a corpse down the stairs… that is if I wasn’t sleeping to hard. I sometimes sleep heavily at night…

It is easy to imagine how hard we’d fight for our wife if it were so stark, isn’t it? “If only there were a LIFE and DEATH situation…then she’d see how knight-like I am.”

Alright, now for the lame but true twist section:

Our spouses are in danger. Every day. They have things that want to use, violate and destroy them lurking around every corner. And thank God they have their husbands for protection…right?

Well some do. And a lot of those husbands are more preoccupied with things like 4×4 rocker bars, fantasy football, or are just plain too complacent to notice.

[As promised – the lame twist.]

What are the dangers?

My wife has been assaulted by this culture’s beliefs and obsessions with body image. Don’t take me wrong: I am all about healthy. But the crap that is pedaled around (Salt Lake billboard for plastic surgery: “Make Your Inner Beauty Jealous”…WTF!) is just that — crap. I heard a guy say that his wife was struggling with a constant obsession to lose weight and how she didn’t like how she looked and concluded, “There’s nothing I can do about it”. I disagree. I believe either guys don’t want to do anything about it, “what’s the worst thing, that she loses a few pounds?” or don’t want to walk onto the thin, dangerous and cracking ice to try and rescue their spouse.

Men: You don’t understand how viscous the food-diet-monster is. The obsession with appearance. I don’t either. I have glimpses, and fight for my wife.


Well first, let me state that I fail some of the time. In my ‘fleshy’ times, I can make it worse and reinforce what culture says. The first battle I’ve had to have is with myself. This battle will never end, as the culture lies to men as well as women.

Next, I make a priority that we eat healthy and get physical activity. It is our lifestyle. It is what we do. We do not eat healthy to lose weight. We eat healthy and exercise because we respect how God made our bodies, and want to take care of them so we can enjoy life as long as we live. I suggest reading the book, Why French Women Don’t Get Fat.

Last, talk about it and change the tone of your household. Remove influences as much as you can that dictate that women must look a certain way. Dialog, dialog, dialog. Women need to talk, men need to listen and not just try to fix everything.

What other dangers are lurking?

A closing thought:

Men, take up your swords, and fight for your wife. If she’s fun now, imagine what she’ll be like when she’s not distracted by lavamonsters (remember the Marines’ commercial) attacking from every side!




6 comments on “Fighting for your wife [from the man cave]
  1. Pingback: Family Finances…And Fights | Bring The Kids

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  4. This is really excellent and important. My wife and I have gone through really good times and really bad times over the last 15 years. One of the things I’ve come to realize (I can be very hard headed and a slow learner!) is that many of the good times come when I am willing to focus on and fight for my wife. My joy increases 100% when I put aside my own crap and spend the time that is needed to encourage and focus on her. My boys are 9 and 5 now and we as a family are finally starting to figure out what we need to do to thrive. Thanks for writing this!

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